[x]

A Dying Rainbow

I'm always told that I'm such a wonderful person
And that I'm thoughtful, caring, kindhearted, and so important
But they don't see what's behind closed doors, the constant clashes with torment
Damage goes unseen as I blanket everything with cold smiles that seem slightly burdened

My tears quake while they hide behind my blackened shades
My hands tremble because I'm holding onto so much of this hate
My body is painted nonchalant so I have to appear in an emotionless state
My blood system is clogged with suicidal thoughts that make me want to break

I've been like this far too long
I wish I died before this had begun
S

Aura: The Radiance

Aura: The Radiance

I wore this pain like a crown / I was so broken
I kept on falling down / I felt my soul shattering

I couldn't hear anything / listening to my own twisted thoughts
I was blinded from everything / witnessing my own tragic downfall

I stopped dreaming of better days / I ceased believing long ago
My countless nightmares wouldn't fade / I was left in this dark world alone

I guess this is how I really pictured my own end
I just want it to finally be over with, I won't resent death

To the end of this long, and lonely road
Dangling on my unfinished rope

Lift me up, lift me up, lift me up, and don't let me go!
Hold me hig

The Peace Seeker

The Peace Seeker

Whispers that no one hears

The world is deaf from despair

The sun becomes my throne

As I watch reality become undone
-
Someone can be another person's hero
If only love existed

Dusk will break with a darker tomorrow
Another day of being two-faced

Every second- a promise is broken
Every minute- a tear is taken

Every hour- a smile is forced
Every day- a child is born

I stitch my mouth shut / I finally had enough
Silence is my sin / Truth is my friend

Seal my eyes wide / Lies can finally hide
I will witness no evil / I will force another smile

Anyone can be someone's demon
Because greed insists it

Peace is no

Wings Of Darkness

Wings Of Darkness

I seek your help to become the unseen
Guide all of this pain back into my lies
Please, never let me experience this again

I need you to blind me from the light
Cease the false hope from shining in vain
Push back the blood and tears so I won't cry

My warrior
Sheath me between your hollow feathers
My defender
Keep me in your tight embrace forever
-
Turn every sad day into calm night
Burn the radiating sun out

Darken the dreaming sky
Let the fading clouds melt

Lock away this cruel gift of sight
I no longer want it

Shut out the world from you and I
I yearn for this

Take away this self-hatred
Bring back my in

Breaking Out Tonight

Breaking Out Tonight

Your name is despair
And you demand that I live in fear

I gave you everything that you have ever asked
But I never got anything in return for any of that
Although you still managed to continually stab me in the back

Your name is remorse
And you wish for me abide by a damaging oath

Nothing but puppet, as I was used as your scapegoat
Sinister strings guided me to cast aside all forms of hope
We considered each other friends, because you were all I used to know

Your name is sorrow
And you want me to never again see tomorrow

I am your undying sacrifice, the one and only reoccurring offering
Once you had a taste,

Shadow World

Shadow World

It's enveloping my heart
And tainting my soul
I've been corrupted by the dark
A new power to behold

I'm too far gone already
Just give in
Accepting my tragedy
A new path will begin

Transform into what I dreamed of
No longer afraid
The road to peace will be victorious
A triumph so great

I closed my eyes for the last time / I watched it all disappear
I left behind my old life / I've become what I've feared
-
I know this path is one that very few desire
But what's done is done
Never again will I look into a mirror
For my darkness and I have become one

It's what I've always want

Promises Of Today

Promises Of Today

The sands of time can be unpredictable
But to mold them is impossible
And being let down is typical

I, for one, know what it's like
Having that unrelenting doubt dwell inside
And withstanding all of those tears that aren't dried

With that said
I want to help you, my dear friend
For the hope of happiness is within the reach of your hands
-
I need to apologize for not always being there
It's because I have my own slate
But now I'm finally here
I'm sorry I'm late

I've been where you are
I've seen what you've seen
And I was able to break through the dark
But I'll go back for you, just to help you believe

That

A Loveless Day

A Loveless Day
(That Will Never Fade)

This same old dream that I so loath
A vision of a dull world shrouded in gray

As I walk down a never ending road
The colorlessness in everything never seems to decay

In slow motion I suffer alone
Under the liquid-silver droplets of rain
-
You had no idea how strong my love was
You played a part in the pain that was dealt and done

You didn't experience the ocean of tears that I had to swim through
You didn't see the countless days I had to endure without being around you

You never felt the sickness within the soul that I had kept
You never knew of the quakes in my heart that you ha

Shadow Sun

Shadow Sun

And in that very moment, I knew it was already too late
My   vision   has   adjusted
The memories of my former life all just slipped away
My   light   has   faded

The last of the fallen sparks fluttered in the distance
My   hope   has   been   obliterated
The shadows rose to claim their long awaited radiance
My   destiny   was    always   fated
-
In my heart, I lost it all
To this very second, it's still my fa

The Unseen Life

The Unseen Life

I thought pain was created to fade
But it seems like my life was crafted to break
So I apologize to the mirror and say "I'm sorry, it's too late."
I can't even look at my own face, as I can never accept my mistakes

I realize that I am brokenly made
-
My mind bleeds away the memories I've wasted
Remorse begins to slowly fill in the gaps that are left
This stained razor blade leaves every dark moment perfectly divided
I try not to indulge in act of prayer, because I refuse to ever confess

Even in death I will never rest
-
All visible colors descend into the ground
And time drifts off to sleep
Every sharp outline a

My Unblind Sins

My Unblind Sins

In the beginning I was emotionally blind
So I always pushed the guilt to the back of my mind
Even though I saw all of my lies with these heartless eyes

I'm the one at fault
For all of the wrong I've done
And I can't live with what my decisions have brought

I'm my own prisoner of these memories
Unforgettable stains of my grief
I'm also the warden, and I can't leave
-
Shackled by my mistakes
Wrapped in a chain of lies
I deserve the past I made
For the future won't be mine

Bound by the pain I gave
Locked in a cage of my conscience
I'm serving my time until the end of days
For this is my own form of self-vengean

Crush

Crush

It's my world
These are my shoulders

It's my burden
These are my problems

It's my life
These are the tears I cry

It's my truth
These are my last moments with you
-
When you said those words
My vision got blurry

I know
You're sorry

We couldn't be "us" anymore
It divides me

Double-edged love / I needed you so much
You're all I really got / Without you- I'm lost

When you walked away
I met the ground

I felt a ripping pain
A deafening sound

I won't get up again
This is my place now
-
This is me on my knees
Let me be weak

This is me breaking down
Let me cry out

This is me at my worst
Let me be hurt

This is me cr

A Sleepless Night

A Sleepless Night
(That Will Never Alight)

This same old nightmare that I grimly fear
An image of my life haunted by your shadows

I'm frozen in place, waiting for daylight to soon appear
But I don't know if I'm ready to take on another loveless tomorrow

Why am I the one who suffers when you're not even really here?
I should not have to be the one inflicted by your falsely bestowed sorrow
-
You made and broke every one of those promises
You left even though you knew that you'd be greatly missed

You were not the one saying that you're so sorry
You were not the one who was left crying uncontrollably

You didn't feel your heart being

True Despair

True Despair

“How the light has darkened.”
“How the strongest have fallen.”

This cloak remains
Unseen by many

A barrier to hide away
Covering up my damaged sanity

I have to act a certain way
And pretend I still have a sense of humanity

But I know it's too late
So there is no restoring me
-
I am both sword and shield
My bane is myself

My wounds will never heal
I am both heaven and hell

I fear my own reflection / I dread my own aggression
I am your ruination / I am your protection

I keep all destruction within / I keep all sympathy distant
I am your nightmare / I am your savior

The gift of infliction
Tells the story

I'm Falling Down

I'm Falling Down

Pain just seemed to pass me by
Swift as tsunami waves touching the sky

Reality was nothing but a mirror
Melting away like frozen water on fading fire

I closed my sorrowful eyes
As if it was going to be the last time

And sparked images of my past that I don't want to remember
I was deceived every time I was told that it was going to get better
-
Flashes of agony
Infected my mind
And stinging anxiety
Shoots up my spine

Breathe/Breathe/Breathe

While despair wraps around my heart
I want to let it all go
This life was just too hard
I don't want it anymore

Please/Please/Please

There was no way out of this
I so

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Wings Of Ice

Wings of Ice

Another layer of frost maims
I'll become one with this eternal winter
A triumph over the the flow of time is mine to claim

My past and future will be torn asunder
And I will freeze the pain in my veins
Never again will I be forced to surrender

My glacier
Shatter all that destroyed me
My blizzard
Blot out society's cruel morality
-
I am but a mirror
A reflection of your sins
I am the terror
Let my revenge begin

I'll show you the face
That you made me create

I'll enjoy your screams
Knowing they're not a dream

Your tears will become icicles
Because to let you cry is hypocritical

You are the corruption that fell

The Peace Seeker

In Between Dreams

In Between Dreams

A fragment of a second
Just one slight glance

You're the only person
That puts me in a trance

I feel so close to you
But I am so far away

If only you knew
I felt this way
-
To fully express this feeling
It's like raw torture at heart
Because you live on without knowing
And it makes me desire you even more

A solace night of dreaming
I thought I never would have it
This longing luxury of sleeping
It's what I've always wanted

I thought it was too much to ask for
A sense of rest and relief
I feel as if it's more than I deserve
It's been so long since I had this nightmaric dise

Silent Faith

Silent Faith

My trembling hands
Don't want to come together

I refuse to feel weakness
Oppress the confessor

I will defy the defeat
Of my body and mind

And my tears will freeze
So I...will never cry
-
I was once told
That I have to be strong
But a child can never grow old
When reminded that every action is wrong

I didn't need to know
That strength was everything
I would have given up a long time ago
Because that is my hollowed instinct

Take back every single breath / Take back those moments I lived
I am not some stepping stone / I am not meant to have a torn soul

You can only push so much / I can choose to give up
You're the only one w

Wings Of Light

Wings Of Light

Upon me is the last dawn
Faded away has the last dusk
I leave behind all of the rights and wrongs
I don't deserve an afterlife that is also rough

Mesmerized in deep suspense
As I await the final arrival
My tears become so intense
These last moments of hope are vital

My bearer
Allow me to break away
My deliverer
Accept the toll of my undying faith
-
I was careless as I fell
Mocking life itself

Every secret I held
Defined a broken side of myself

An inner slaughter I could not defend
A one-sided war that I could not fight against

My downfall is what I didn't want to prevent
I always lusted after the idea of

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Submitted: August 18, 2012
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[x]

No More Therapy

by *ImmortalizedLies, Aug 18, 2012, 2:24:54 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

No More Therapy

Nothing works anymore
I knew it all along; the end is near
I've said it once and I've said it before
I was never meant to exist; I was not meant to be here

Hated by all / See me fall
Loved by none / Heart is numb
Rejected by life / Fallen from strife
From this- I've become / After this- I'm done

Through this blame
Is the choice
Of my decision

Hear the pain
In my voice
I am suffering
-
_{I no longer could drown out the sounds
Swallowed from within
I was surrounded by an internal doubt
Regretting everything

Remember the days
Relive the nights
Of my shame
In my mind

Growing up in society
I got lost
Being raised with hypocrisy
I am wrong}

-
What am I living for?
All I know is this constant fear
What is the cure for a pain when life is the source?
You cannot break and repair what you didn't handle with care

I'm anything but loved / Let the mistakes be undone
I know what's right / This is my plight
No turning back / Hope won't last
Do or die / Choice was mine

Through my death
Is the decision
Of obtaining true serenity

It's the end
I'm really leaving
There's no more therapy

No More Therapyby *ImmortalizedLies

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Sometimes I just feel like, quittin' I still might
Why do I put up this fight, why do I still write
Sometimes it's hard enough just dealin' with real life
Eminem~
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__________________________________________
This poem is written for my project- "The Prodigy's Suicide"
In volume one: A Tragedy In The Making
__________________________________________
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Watch me if you think that you might like my work.

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~Aaron-Jay Nov 30, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

life is full of hardships and therapists can't know how to cure everything. Something's we have to soothe on our own. This poem is full of pain and sorrow. I like all the wonderfully descriptive descriptions you use (is that too repetitive?) . You have a way with words and painting a picture in our heads.

*ImmortalizedLies Dec 3, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Yeah, I guess therapists can't do everything. And you're right, sometimes we have to find the sense of peace on our own.

I changed some words and lines around to make it flow better. I'm so happy that you liked this one. If I had to choose one poem that could describe the whole project- I'd have this choose this one out of all.

~Aaron-Jay Dec 3, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

well, I like it, and not to toot my own horn or anything; but that's all that matters in life.

Flagged as Spam

~reflectionsinwater Aug 19, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

I really do like the part when you contrast the fault between her's and yours quite well, although I'm still a bit confused with what sort of therapy is it, or how it is used. Great job still

*ImmortalizedLies Aug 20, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

I don't know how you came to assume there is a "Her" or a "Him" in this piece, I didn't mention any genders. This is more about a person with severe mental health issues, and not being able to cope with them. And I know the whole concept is kind of weird, but I tried to get the point across that there is no such therapy that could help this person. None what-so-ever. So, that's why it ends like that. I apologize for it being kind of scrambled.

"There is no therapy
That could cure me"

~reflectionsinwater Aug 20, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Oh. I understand it now. Thanks for clarifying it

.
(Yeah, I was kinda sick yesterday from diarrhea. My head was wacked up then. Sorry!

)

~willyoudieforme Aug 19, 2012 Student Filmographer

This is so incredible

Amazing job

*ImmortalizedLies Aug 21, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

<3
Thank you, it means a lot.

~willyoudieforme Aug 24, 2012 Student Filmographer

You are very welcome

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